GUY AT DINNER PARTY SAW A DOCUMENTARY

Friends gathered at Tina’s the other night for a Christmas party and were adding finishing touches to the guacamole when Sean announced he saw a documentary.

“It really highlighted the disparities,” he observed, wisdom knotting his brow, “between one side and the other.”

Those present, including colleagues, friends, and spouses, were instantly taken by his relevance and his exotic erudition, stricken by his bulletin that “species are dying everyday and the education system is in shambles.”

Just before Sean’s wizened offerings to his plebeian brethren, including the observation that “the world is just growing beyond all measures to understand it”, the discussion surrounded base, animalistic topics like what filters Snapchat had for Christmas or how to tell if Filo should message a guy he met yesterday.

“Thankfully,” said Stephanie, a girl who will inevitably fall for Sean’s mysterious standoffishness just as she had fallen for Vivek in high school and Matt in college, “Sean saved us from our low brow existence and inadvertently promised that if I ever wanted to Netflix and chill with him he would just watch the movie the whole time.”

Tina, the host, was quiet for most of the five-minute synopsis that Sean had probably delivered in at least three other settings, but confessed that what she really looked forward to was hearing what part of California he determined her wine came from.

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